My Nemesis

My back is my nemesis. I am lordotic so I have a deep curvature in my lower spine. This means that I bend easily but when I do yoga and undergo serious backbends, I have a tendency to bend from my lower back instead of my middle back so I end up injuring myself.

My back injuries started when I did ashtanga yoga and my previous yoga teacher just found me so bendy that he made me grab my ankles while in a backbend and I tweaked my back. It has been a constant battle for me to overcome this because one wrong move and I injure it again. I have been in and out of rehab because of this and my last one was before I got pregnant with my second child.

Surprisingly, I didn't have any back pains during my pregnancy. Afterwards, I slowly worked my way to strengthening my core by doing weights, plyometrics and yoga. I thought that I have made my back strong enough until the other day.

I slept with my baby and he was having a pretty fidgety night so I had to cradle him in a certain position while lying down. When I woke up and got up the next morning, the right side of my back was in pain. I just thought that it was probably like having a stiff neck but it was happening to my back. I still went to Bikram but modified some postures. When I went to Bikram again the day after that, my back was worse so I had to modify the postures even more. I was in a lot of pain the following day.

I have been nursing my back with hot compresses and massages but my spine and hips are hurting. I have been trying to get an appointment with a doctor nearby but they are either out of town or their clinic here is still at the end of the week.

I can't believe that I'm here in this position again. Injuries don't affect only your body but your mind as well. Inspite of my injury, I still want to practice but I'm trying to find a balance because I know that I'm getting older and that I need to respect my body as well. I don't know what happened to me but I vow to get over this and beat this weakness! I know I can do it but I'm still figuring out how...